You may shake your head with painful memories of large dollar amounts lost, and swear on a stack of Bibles that you will never again be foolish enough to engage in a shoot-out with the One-Armed Bandit, but who are you kidding? Maybe, with a little luck, you will be able to resist the call of the slot machine for a few weeks, perhaps even a month or two. But you know damn well that you’ll be back for a rematch sooner or later. You can’t just let that Bandit win so easily, can you? No way.
It’s just a machine, after all, with a Slot“brain” comprised of wires and microchips. You, on the other hand, are a living, breathing entity with the capacity for critical thinking and self-reflection. If humankind is to have any hope at all in surviving the global war against machines that surely will come some day, we’d better at least be able to beat the slots. Think of the matter in this kind of sweeping historical context and you will see that it’s not simply a choice but an obligation for you to get back on the horse as soon as possible.
Before launching on your noble quest in defense of humanity, it would be wise to review some basic information and arm yourself with five crucial tips to success.
You may not know that the slot machine goes by different names in overseas nations. For instance, within the United Kingdom, it is called a fruit machine (no jokes about British drag queens, please.) In Australia, the slot is known as a “poker machine,” which is even more confusing, but what can you expect from a culture that gives outdoor grills the name of a little girl’s toy? (Let it sink in for a minute, you’ll get it.)
Anyway, traditional American slot machines are coin-operated and contain three or more reels, which spin when a lever on the side of the machine is pulled. The machines include a currency detector that validates the money inserted to play. The m